Monday, October 3, 2011

"The Pulpit"...... I got "Goose Bumps" just viewing this!!! and Understanding Engineers

DAY three is in Ottawa, and here is part three of that trip

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDg1CwIR7AI


Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.


Bertrand Russell
Bertrand Arthur William Russell was a British philosopher, logician, mathematician, historian, and social critic

Understanding Engineers #1
>>>
>>> Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one
>>> said, "
Where did you get such a great bike?"* *
>>> The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday,
>>> minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike,
>>> threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what
>>> you want."
>>> The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The
>>> clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."_
>>>
>>>
>>> _/_Understanding Engineers #2_/_
>>> __
>>> _To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is
>>> half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to
>>> be._
>>>
>>>
>>> _/_Understanding Engineers #3_//_
>>> _/_
>>> _A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
>>> particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's with
>>> those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!"
>>> The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept
>>> golf!"
>>> The priest said, "Here comes the green-keeper. Let's have a word with
>>> him.." He said, "Hello, George. What's wrong with that group ahead of
>>> us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"
>>> The green-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen.
>>> They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we
>>> always let them play for free anytime."
>>> The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I
>>> think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."
>>> The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist
>>> colleague and see if there's anything she can do for them."
>>> The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"
>>>
>>>
>>> /_Understanding Engineers #4_//_
>>> _/_
>>> _What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil
>>> engineers?
>>> Mechanical engineers build weapons. Civil engineers build targets.
>>> _
>>>
>>> _/_Understanding Engineers #5_/_
>>>
>>> _ The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
>>> The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
>>> The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
>>> The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"_
>>>
>>>
>>> _/_Understanding Engineers #6
>>> _/_
>>> _Three engineering students were gathered together discussing who must
>>> have designed the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer.
>>> Just look at all the joints."
>>> Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has
>>> many thousands of electrical connections."
>>> The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a mechanical
>>> engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a
>>> recreational area?"_
>>>
>>>
>>> _/_Understanding Engineers #7_//_
>>> _/
>>> Normal people believe that if it isnt' broke, don't fix it.
>>> Engineers believe that if it isn't broke, it doesn't have enough
>>> features yet._
>>>
>>>
>>> _/_Understanding Engineers #8
>>> _/_
>>> _An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him
>>> and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent
>>> over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.
>>> The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a
>>> beautiful princess and stay with you for one week."
>>> The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned
>>> it to the pocket.
>>> The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a
>>> princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want."
>>> Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into
>>> his pocket..
>>> Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a
>>> beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do
>>> anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"
>>> The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a
>>> girlfriend, but a talking frog - now that's cool."






.. I got "Goose Bumps" just viewing this!!!

Real craziness  -  all it takes is one push.
 



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