Try This for a Change
Think of a positive trait you would like to master. In order to integrate this trait, role play. Imagine that you have already changed that trait and see how this new pattern becomes a part of your everyday reality. Be patient and practice regularly.
Love Yehuda Lave
Flash mob scene fun:
Magician walking on Water--Spiritual???
and here is the answer:
GOOD MORNING! Did you ever notice how many jokes there are about marriage? "What's the shortest sentence in the English language? 'I am.' What is the longest sentence? 'I do.' or: "Marriage is like a deck of cards -- you start off with hearts and diamonds ... and then you look for a club and a spade." Why are there so many jokes? There is a lot of pain in a bad marriage and with a joke you can verbalize the pain in an acceptable manner -- and know you are not alone. It takes wisdom, focus and effort to create a happy marriage.
Would you like a happier, more blissful marriage? Then you'll probably want to keep
Teaches Rabbi Pamensky: Men and women are different, not just physically and emotionally. Perhaps the biggest difference is that women are relationship beings ... and men are not. At one seminar he divided the men and women into two groups to come up with descriptions of the ideal husband, wife and marriage. When they reassembled, he called upon a woman. However, before asking her for the descriptions, he asked her the name of a woman who was in her group. "How many children? Boys? Girls?" He then asked the same questions to 2 other women. The women knew about each woman in the group.
Rabbi Pamensky then called upon a man and asked him to name ANY man in the group. He couldn't do it. None of them could. They had worked out excellent descriptions of the ideal husband, wife and marriage, but it just wasn't important to know each other's names or about their families. Says Rabbi Pamensky, "When do they learn the names of the other men? When their wives introduce them!"
What do men need to be successful with a relationship being? They need a job description to know what to do! Here is a husband's job description: Your job is to make your wife happy all the time! If one told women that their job was to make their husband happy -- then the husband would be happy. However, if the husband makes his wife happy, she'll return it multifold ... because she is a relationship being! Make her happy and she'll make the relationship happy and filled with intimacy, connection, closeness, passion and growth.
How does one make his wife happy? Rabbi Pamensky quotes Rabbi Moshe Aharon Stern, of blessed memory, who once advised, "All you have to do are the 3 A's -- Attention, Affection and Appreciation. A woman needs attention, craves affection and so rightly deserves appreciation!" (When Rabbi Pamensky once asked a group if they knew what the "3 A's" are that one should give his wife, one cynical pundit said, "Yes! American Express, Apology and Alimony...)
Advises Rabbi Pamensky, "The relationship is not about thinking. The language of a relationship is feelings. Feelings have nothing to do with logic. A man has to make his wife feel that she is the most important part of his life, the absolute first priority!"
How does one give attention? Put down the newspaper, stop typing on the computer or texting on the Blackberry, turn off the music ... turn around, face your wife, look her in the eyes ... and listen. Why does a woman interrupt at the last moment of a football or basketball game in overtime? She wants to know that she is more important than the game. Give her attention and she'll give you space.
How does one give his wife affection? A man tends to compartmentalize life: business tones, parenting tones, walking the dog tones. For his wife he needs affectionate tones -- tones of of love and respect for everytime he speaks with her!
What does Rabbi Pamensky advise women to know in order to make their husbands happy? Two things: 1) All men are giant egos with legs -- and egos need stroking all the time, especially when your husband does his job of making you happy! He has to feel that if you were the only woman alive and you had 3 billion resumes of men wanting to marry you, that you'd pick him! You mean the most to him. You know him best. Therefore, your ego stroke is the only real ego stroke he gets in life.
The second thing a woman has to know in order to make her husband happy is to give her husband a break -- especially when he does NOT do his job of making his wife happy! Do not nag, harp or criticize him when he slips up. It doesn't help. It makes everything worse! Give him a break when he doesn't do his job and be appreciative when he does -- then he'll be more likely to make you happy in the future.
You don't have to believe everything in this list.
Subject: STRANGE FACTS
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