Tuesday, November 26, 2019

The (Sometimes) Mysterious, (Always) Wonderful World of Siblings by Linda Hirschel and Beatles Yesterday and exciting Hevron Trip tomorrow, you can still come

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Yehuda Lave, Spiritual Advisor and Counselor

Yehuda Lave is an author, journalist, psychologist, rabbi, spiritual teacher and coach, with degrees in business, psychology and Jewish Law. He works  with people from all walks of life and helps them in their search for greater happiness, meaning, business advice on saving money,  and spiritual engagement

Love Yehuda Lave

The essence of the Redemption depends upon learning Kabbalah

Vilna Gaon

The goal of the Redemption is the redemption of truth.

Vilna Gaon


Your fellow man is your mirror. If your own face is clean, the image you perceive will also be flawless. But should you look upon your fellow man and see a blemish, it is your own imperfection that you are encountering - you are being shown what it is that you must correct within yourself.

Baal Shem Tov

Exciting Hebron tour by Shalom Pollack - Still time to sign up!

A lot of people will be visiting Hevron this Shabbat for Parasha Chaya Sarah. Personally I love Hevron, but I don't love crowds. I will be going (bli -neder) with Shalom Pollock Wednesday without the crowds and coming home to sleep in my own bed. Let me know if you sign up and if you are coming please.Yehuda


Hevron as never before.
 Wednesday, November 27
  We will visit the  Hevron that most do not see or experience.
 Besides the Patriarchs and Matriarchs tombs, we will visit:
 - The recently excavated remains of Second Temple Hevron including the largest ritual baths ever found.
- The remains of the city from the times of the Patriarchs and Matriarchs.- The new audio-visual presentation and the refurbished history museum. - The renewed Jewish quarter including the redeemed "Avraham Avinu" synagogue. - View of the city from the roof of the rebuilt  "Shavei Hevron yeshiva"
-  Visit with a pioneer family of the renewed ancient Jewish quarter. We will have lunch in the "pioneers cafeteria". You can purchase food there or bring your own. 
On the way back to Yerushalayim we will visit Rachel's tomb.
 Departure at 9:00 from the Inbal hotel Return around 5:00
Cost: 200 shekels

George Carlin on aging!

(Absolutely Brilliant)
George Carlin's Views on Aging
Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.
'How old are you?' ' I'm four and a half!' You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.
You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
'How old are you?' 'I'm gonna be 16!' You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life! You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony. YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!
But then you turn 30. Oooohh , what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50, and your dreams are gone....
But! wait!! ! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!
So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50, and make it to 60.
You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that, it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
You get into your 80's, and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there.. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; 'I Was JUST 92.'
Then a strange thing happens.. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. 'I'm 100 and a half!'

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!!
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever, even ham radio. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's family name is Alzheimer's.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves Be ALIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

RECORD NUMBER: 45,000 People Spend Shabbos In Hebron At Me'aras Ha'Machpela


Italian Synagouge and Museum 103119

On Halloween, I take advantage of the over 100 open houses in Jerusalem and see for the first time the famous Italian synagogue and museum in the Center of Jerusalem that has been there for 65 years

Jewish player Alex Bregman breaks a World Series home run record | The Times of Israel


Kahane on the Parsha Rabbi Binyamin Kahane- Parshat Noach A BEACON OF TRUTH

For 120 years, Noah fulfilled G-d's directive to build an ark, all the while warning people about the impending flood. The Midrash relates that when people would pass by and ask Noah what he was doing, he would reply, "The Almighty is bringing a flood upon the world." But the people disregarded Noah's warning and reacted with vicious mockery (Bereishit Rabba 30:7).

This Midrash seems to contain an implicit criticism of Noah. After all, for 120 years Noah warned that G-d would destroy the world if the people continued in their evil ways. But no one listened. In the end, the flood wiped out the entire world, except for Noah and his family. Not a single person was convinced to do teshuva by Noah's warnings. Not one! Noah's life endeavor of 120 years was essentially a failure.
Or was it?

The story of Noah provides us with a concrete illustration of the true role of a Jewish prophet. Certainly, the primary purpose of his warnings and rebukes is to inspire his audience to do teshuva. But unlike what one might think, if the prophet does not succeed in convincing people to do teshuva, he did not necessarily fail. Deeper reflection will reveal that the rebuke in and of itself has value.
If we look at the prophets of Israel, we will notice an amazing fact: Generally speaking, they were dismal failures. It seems as if they influenced no one. The people were not interested in listening to them and did not cease their evil ways. But does that mean their warnings had no value? Of course not. After all, the words of the prophets are inscribed forever in our holy bible.

When G-d appoints Ezekiel to be a prophet, He says, "I am sending you to the Children of Israel...they have rebelled against Me...you shall say to them, 'Thus says the L-rd G-d.' And they--whether they hear or refuse to hear...--will know a prophet has been amongst them" (Ezekiel 2:3-5). Immediately afterwards, G-d states, "But the house of Israel will not hearken to you..." (ibid. 3:7). Can this be? If G-d knows they won't listen, why send Ezekiel and expose him to so much humiliation and abuse?

He does so because the proclamation of truth has value even if it has no apparent influence at the moment it is proclaimed. What is its value? As G-d says: The people "will know that a prophet has been amongst them." Even if there are no immediate results, the warnings have value in that they bring G-d's word into the world. The prophet who expresses divine truth is giving expression to G-d's presence in this world, showing us that the world is not a free-for-all - that there is right and wrong, reward and punishment. By proclaiming the truth, the prophet, in essence, sanctifies G-d's Name.

Furthermore, while G-d knows for certain that the nation won't listen to a particular rebuke, the righteous, who are obligated to rebuke, do not know that (Shabbat 55a). In other words, we can never be sure that our words won't influence people, and therefore we must say them. Even more, we must realize that our words can have an impact tens, or even hundreds, of years down the road, as the Talmud states about prophets whose influence was not apparent during their lifetime: "Prophecy which is needed for future generations is written down" (Megillah 14a).

My father, HY"D, saw his major role as one of a "prophet" who must warn and rebuke the people. That is, to say the truth of G-d- the same truth which no one else dares express thanks to 101 different excuses ("it's not practical", "it's not realistic," etc.). And while it may appear sometimes that all efforts are in vain, such is not the case in the long run. In the long run, it is sticking with the truth that makes a real impact on the nation and the course of history.
Darka Shel Torah, 1997
Shabbat Shalom!

Yesterday (With Spoken Word Intro / Live From Studio 50, New York City / 1965)

1500 year old Church uncovered in Bet Shemesh



The (Sometimes) Mysterious, (Always) Wonderful World of Siblings Linda Hirschel

"Gail did it!" wails 2-year-old Sharon to her mother after yet another altercation with her 5-year-old sister. More wailing, as her mother attempts to comfort her. Finally, she offers her a red jelly bean. Sharon takes it gratefully but continues to whimper. "And one for Gail?" she asks, holding out her other hand.

Siblings. How do we understand the intense rivalry intertwined with unwavering loyalty?

I once heard that siblings argue on average, siblings argue every 6.3 minutes average every 6.3 minutes. The brother becomes irate when his sister plays with, touches (or even looks at!) his carefully curated collection of marbles; the sister screeches when he throws the ball just out of reach.

And loyalty? Ask any camp counselor. Two brothers might be having a fistfight, but later on, if someone starts up with his little brother, you can be sure the older one will come racing to defend him.

So on the one hand, we have this animosity that seems bottomless; on the other, we have infinite devotion. We also know that brothers and sisters learn boundaries and behavior from each other. They learn that this jostle is allowed, that punch was too hard, and this then helps them navigate relationships beyond their immediate family with more understanding and flexibility.

When a child feels less love from a parent, it is bound to impact the relationship between the siblings. I knew a family wrought with tremendous strife. Sadly, dysfunction had been passed down from parents to children. The father, Max, was a very difficult man to live with, and his daughter Rachel became estranged from him. When Max passed away, he left her not a button nor a string in his will.

Rachel counter-attacked with the best lawyers she could find. Eventually, she and her brothers reached a settlement outside of court: she received a small bone thrown her way, but nothing compared to what the two brothers received. Somehow, after all of the ugly sibling fighting, they were able to begin the process of building their relationship, something they continue to work towards.

I know of another family where the bond between the siblings remains as strong as ever. Every time there is a wedding, all 12 brothers and sisters get together and help pay for the bride's jewelry, or the band, or whatever is necessary. They know that their parents cannot afford the entire expense, so they all chip in. Their motto is: "All for one, and one for all!"

Sibling rivalry, however, is as ancient as the book of Genesis.

The story of Cain and Abel brought sibling jealousy into the world, as we know. And then we have Ham, the third son of Noah. There are commentaries that say he didn't want his father to have more children because then he would have to share his world with more siblings.

We can, however, learn a few tips from our forefathers and foremothers about how to minimize sibling rivalry in a family.

Abraham had two sons, Isaac and Ishmael. Isaac's mother was Sarah, and Ishmael's mother was Hagar, but they were all living in Abraham's house. Ishmael was a negative influence on Isaac, perhaps even a physical threat. Although it was very difficult for Abraham to do so, G‑d commanded him to send Ishmael away.

Of course, our children don't need this type of extreme punishment. But sometimes they need a time-out or consequence for their actions when the fighting gets out of hand. We can learn from Abraham that even though it's not easy to put boundaries on sibling disagreements, it must be done at times for the sake of peace or to protect a child.

Sometimes, we put all of our efforts into a child, and he or she ultimately, our children are responsible for their own choices still ends up going in a direction we do not approve of. Both Jacob and Esau grew up in an exceptional environment. With such righteous parents as Isaac and Rebecca, one might think those perfectly righteous children would emerge. As it turns out, Esau became a treacherous hypocrite, saying one thing and doing another. There are numerous commentaries that explain why Isaac still wanted to confer upon Esau the very special spiritual blessings. The lesson that we want to extract from the episode of Jacob and Esau is that we can give a child the very best education and the very best models, but a child has free will. Ultimately, our children are responsible for their own choices, no matter how disappointing those choices may be.

Then there is the story of Joseph. His father Jacob gave him a beautiful coat. His brothers were righteous men, but nevertheless felt compelled to sell Joseph into slavery. From their point of view, the brothers truly thought that Joseph was dangerous to the people of Israel, but underneath their righteous indignation, was there a smidgen of jealousy because their father seemed to love Joseph more?

As a parent, try not to show favoritism towards one child over another. It will invariably cause strife among siblings. If you look hard enough, you can always find something unique to cherish about each of your children.

And here are a few tips I learned from nearly 30 years of being a mother and a grandmother:

  • When her sister is in hearing range, look a little baby in the eyes and tell her how much you love her and her big sister. Tell her how lucky she is to have such a big sister. This goes a long way.
  • Give each child even five minutes of quality time every day. Five minutes!
  • If your children are away, call each child on the phone at least once a day. If they are married, at least once a week.
  • Show that you worry and care about the test that your child had that day, the presentation that she was nervous about, etc.
  • And finally, never speak badly about one child to another.

There is nothing quite like the bond between siblings. A family is the perfect laboratory for learning love, loyalty, and honesty.

Linda Hirschel Linda Hirschel is a freelance writer and CBT therapist living in Israel. She is a mother and a grandmother, and she enjoys making soups and growing flowers.

See you tomorrow

Love Yehuda Lave

Rabbi Yehuda Lave

PO Box 7335, Rehavia Jerusalem 9107202


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