RABBI SCHWARTZ'S END OF DAYS JOKES OF THE WEEK Only in Israel can there be a feeling that a war is about to break out in middle of a two year war… Israel eliminates Hussein Salami now we need to wait 6 hours before we go after Hosein Chalavi Just in Iran is enlisting the help of the Gaza ministry of Health to count its causalties, They're up to 2.7 million babies The Missiles from Iran will arrive between 10:00 AM until 1:00 PM just like the HOTTechnician Iran is threatening that they will be turning to Israel's Supreme Court and it's Yoetz Mispati to file a complaint. Knock, knock. Who's there? Armageddon. Armageddon who? Armageddon tired of all this knockin'! I was watching a horror movie about the Apocalypse. It took me 5 minutes to realize I was on the news channel. A man on a tractor has just driven past me yelling "the end of the world is near" I think it was Farmer Geddon How do you kiss someone at the end of the world? On the apocalypse. I make apocalypse jokes...Like there's no tomorrow So what if I don't know what Armageddon means? It's not the end of the world A man finally returns home from WWIII to his dog The dog asks: "Did you go for a walk without me?" The man replies: "No, Iran". I heard llamas are going to bring about the end of the world. It's going to be Alpaca-lyptic. What do you call it when pigs cause the end of the world? The aporkalypse. Before the end of the world, God gathered three presidents: Trump, Bibi and Putin God told them: "Go and tell your people that in two weeks, the world will end." Trump went back to US and said: "I have two pieces of news. One is good, and the other is bad. The good news is that God exists. The bad news is that in two weeks, the world will end". Putin went back to Russia and said: "I have two pieces of news. One is bad, and the other is even worse. The bad news is that God exists. The worse news is that in two weeks, world will end". Bibi went back to Israel and said: "I have two pieces of news, and both are good! First is that God himself recognized me as prime minister! And the second is that I'll rule until the end of the world!" |