| RABBI SCHWARTZ'S TERRIBLE JEWISH MOTHER JOKES OF THE WEEK Hershy and Barbra have been having trouble in their marriage for a while. So when they hear about a marriage seminar promising to make their marriage great they decide to attend. "One of the most important things in marriage", says the speaker, "is to get to really know your spouse well. For example, how many of you know what's your wife's favorite type of flower is? Something like this is very important." Heshyy smiles, proud of himself, leans over to Barbara and whispers, "It's all-purpose Spelt flour isn't it?" Morris Epstein stopped by the florist to pick up something for his wife.
"That's a nice little bouquet," said a woman, pointing to the flowers Morris was buying. "Yeah, my wife and I had an argument last night," Morris admitted. "I was going to buy her a dozen roses, but after I thought about it a bit, I don't think she's that mad at me." Moishe was at the flower store.
"Sorry, we don't have potted geraniums," the clerk told Moishe, and then added helpfully, "Could you use African violets?" "No," replied Moishe sadly, "It was geraniums my wife Miriam told me to water while she was gone." Solly Lieberman stopped off at the flower store and picked up a beautiful bouquet of flowers for his wife's birthday.
"A little surprise, eh?" smiled the clerk. "You bet," answered Solly. "She's expecting a cruise." An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great I would recommend it very highly.
The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?" The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... the one that's red and has thorns." "Do you mean a rose?" "Yes, that's the one," replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?" The wife has just phoned me to tell me that 3 women in her office have received flowers today and they are absolutely gorgeous.
I said, "That's probably why !!" Someone keeps sending me flowers with the heads cut off. I think I'm being stalked
God initially planned to use wasps to pollinate flowers. But in the end, he went with plan Bee.
my wife complains that i don't buy her flowers. To be honest, i didn't know she sold flowers
Roses are red, violets are blue. When it comes to flower colors, the person who wrote this rhyme really has no clue.
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