| RABBI SCHWARTZ'S FUNNY GAZA MEMES/ JOKES OF THE WEEK (Take it with a grain of salt--not much is funny about the whole situation, but Jews like to make jokes) Every day the News reports of another Hamas commander killed in an air strike in Gaza? How many commanders are there? I'm starting to suspect that just like every guy in Lakewood calls himself a Rabbi, every Muhammed and Ahmed in Gaza calls themselves a Commander The difference between us and them Hamas terrorist- Mommy, look at me! I killed 10 Israelis! Israeli Soldier- Mommy look at me I saved 10 people! A Jew for Palestine protestor is like a chicken demonstrating for Colonel Sanders In times of tragedy we send humanitarian aid and doctors to the world and they send us their world leaders- every one gets what they're lacking… A reminder for those in Gaza on October 29th we turn the clock back to the Stone Age Israeli soldier to Hamas terrorist "How old are you" Terrorist- "Next month I'll be 24" Soldier- "Wow, you're optimistic" This war has it's benefits. When ever my children start fighting I put on my ringtone that sounds like a war siren… Works great! Achmed- "Fatima! Did you finish cleaning the house?" Fatima- "All I have left are the steps" It's God's job to judge the terrorists. It's ours to arrange the meeting… And just like that I haven't seen any Black Hebrew Israelites proclaiming themselves to be the "Real Jews" over the past three weeks. Weird… Neturei Karta- "We were Pro-Hamas before it was trendy" Proven Conversation winner with Pro-Palestinian activist. 1) Ask him if he feels Israel has a right to respond to terror against it's citizens. 2) When he tells you "No!" then ask him "Why" 3) Wait until he tells you something stupid about "how violence only leads to more violence and makes the situation worse and will hurt innocent civilians" 4) Punch him in the face 5) when he tries to punch you back explain to him how violence only leads to more violence… 6) If he agrees with you. Punch him again in the face. 7) and again and again and again until he understands that sometimes you have to punch back… Why do we need to report that there were 500 people killed in Gaza. Why not just say that their unemployment level is down by 10% percent. | 
