When someone is angry at you, organize wisely what you wish to say. Begin speaking in a manner that is likely to have a calming effect. For example, begin by admitting your own mistakes. When you start off in an appeasing manner, the person will pay more attention to your words, and this will prevent him from causing you harm or loss.
We find an example when Abigail successfully calmed down King David, who was furious at her husband (see Shmuel 1, 25:25). She began by admitting that she herself had made an error. Only then did she present her arguments to King David. When you concede that you are wrong, others calm down.
When someone is angry at you, and you start out by either blaming him or denying it, you will usually increase the person's anger. If you want someone's anger to escalate, the best way to do this is to either say: "It's your fault, not mine."
It takes courage to admit your own mistakes. Even if you are only responsible in a small way, it is still best to start off by saying something like, "Yes, I could (or should) have done differently. I'm sorry for any pain or inconvenience I have caused you."
This will put the other person in a calmer state, and he will then be much more likely to listen to what you have to say in your own defense.
Love Yehuda Lave
Meet my new neighbors. I am moving to this area after Rosh Hashanna (about a mile away from where I am now). See them dance.Yehuda
http://www.israelvideonetwork.
Yiddish in Los Angeles
The morality of dishonesty.
Robbers entered a bank in a small town.
One of them shouted: "Don't move! The money
belongs to the bank. Your lives belong to you.”
Immediately all the people in the bank laid on the
floor quietly and without panic.
This is an example of how the correct wording
of a sentence can make everyone change their view of the world.
One woman laid on the floor in a provocative
manner.
The robber approached her saying, " Ma'am,
this is a robbery not a rape. Please behave accordingly."
This is an example of how to behave
professionally, and focus on the goal.
While running from the bank the youngest robber
(who had a college degree) said to the oldest robber (who had barely finished
elementary school): "Hey, maybe we should count how much we stole?"
The older man replied: "Don’t be stupid. It's
a lot of money so let's wait for the news on TV to find out how much money was
taken from the bank."
This is an example of how life experience is
more important than a degree.
After the robbery, the manager of the bank said to
his accountant:
"Let's call the cops and tell them how much
has been stolen."
"Wait”, said the Accountant, "before we
do that, let's add that money we took for ourselves over the past few months
and also add in any other problems and just say that it was stolen as part of
today’s robbery."
This is an example of taking
advantage of an opportunity.
The following day it was reported in the news that
the bank was robbed of $3 million.
The robbers then counted the money, but they found
only $1 million so they started to grumble.
"We risked our lives for $1 million, while
the bank's management robbed two million dollars without blinking? Maybe
its better to learn how to work the system, instead of being a simple
robber."
This is an example of how knowledge can be
more useful than power.
Moral: Give a person a gun, and he can rob a bank . Give a person a bank, and he can rob everyone.
