Yehuda Lave is an author, journalist, psychologist, rabbi, spiritual teacher and coach, with degrees in business, psychology and Jewish Law. He works with people from all walks of life and helps them in their search for greater happiness, meaning, business advice on saving money, and spiritual engagement
Unity needed for the Jewish People
The first portion of Bamidbar (Numbers) is generally read before the Shavuos festival, which commemorates the giving of the Torah at Sinai. Inasmuch as there are no coincidences, we may assume that this portion is a prerequisite for receiving the Torah.
In relating the episode at Sinai, the Torah states:
"Israelites camped near the mountain" (Exodus 19:2).
However, the Torah uses the singular vayichan, "he camped" rather than vayachanu, "they camped." Rashi explains that the singular indicated that all the Israelites were united as one person. It is this unity that made them worthy of receiving the Torah.
There is nothing so dear to God as unity among His children. So much so, that the Talmud states that when Jews are united, God forgives even their gravest sins (Kallah 8).
The Sages teach, "You have no person without his hour and no thing without its place" (Ethics of the Fathers 4:3). One of the chassidic masters asked, "If every person has a specific time and place, why is there so much dissension among us?" He answered, "Because many people are envious of others, and wish to occupy their time and place." If we were free of envy, we might achieve the coveted unity.
This portion of the Torah describes the organization of the Israelites. "The Children of Israel shall encamp, each person by his banner according to the insignia of his father's household" (Numbers 2:2). Each person knew his place. The Kohanim had their place, the Levites had their place and every single person knew his rightful place. It was this knowledge and acceptance of one's place that enabled the Israelites to be a unit rather than fragmented.
We may conceptualize unity of a nation as a symphony orchestra, where each musician has a designated assignment. If the percussionist or the flute player would balk at his assignment because the violinist plays a better part, the performance would suffer. No one musician is of greater importance than another. This is equally true of the Jewish nation. We all have specific assignments: Kohanim, Levites, Israelites, men, women, Torah scholars, lay people. We are one harmonious unit.
The message of Bamidbar (Numbers) is the message of unity: "The Children of Israel shall encamp, each person by his banner." This is why the Torah reading of Bamidbar precedes Shavuous. Unity is the prerequisite for acceptance of the Torah.
Love Yehuda Lave
THE AMAZING BOY WRITING DOLL
This is absolutely amazing considering that all of the gears and cams were hand made! Doc
The Swiss had/have some genius mechanical engineers and craftsmen.
Swiss-made watches are still among the best today.
A 240-year-old doll; you have never seen anything like this before.
Watch the doll's eyes as he writes with a pen on the paper.
Yes, it is 240 years old.
This video will fascinate just about all the engineers, artists, clockmakers, doll makers, computer programmers, want-to-be inventors, or basically anyone out there that likes to tinker. This is far more than tinkering.
You can view this doll in person at the Muse d'Art et d'Histoire of Neuchtel, in Switzerland.
When you view this, think computers. Enjoy. It is truly amazing and remember, this was built in the 1770s.
Forklift Driver Causes an Entire Warehouse to Fall like Dominoes
When Insults had Class
These glorious insults are from an era " before" the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.
A member of Parliament to Disraeli:"Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease." "That depends, Sir, "said Disraeli,"whether I embrace your policies or your mistress"
"He had delusions of adequacy."-Walter Kerr
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."- Winston Churchill "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure."-Clarence Darrow
"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary."-William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway) "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."-Moses Hadas "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."-Mark Twain "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."-Oscar Wilde
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one." -George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one."-Winston Churchill, in response "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."-Stephen Bishop "He is a self-made man and worships his creator."-John Bright "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."-Irvin S. Cobb "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others."-Samuel Johnson"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."- Paul Keating "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."-Charles, Count Talleyrand "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."-Forrest Tucker "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?"-Mark Twain "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."-Mae West "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."-Oscar Wilde "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination."-Andrew Lang (1844-1912) "He has Van Gogh's ear for music."-Billy Wilder "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But I'm afraid this wasn't it."-Groucho Marx
An estimated 50% of marriages end in divorce
This does not mean that the other 50% are living in bliss - many marriages stay together for the sake of the kids or have settled for mediocrity after giving up hope. They have a greater tolerance for pain, like the person in the dentist's chair who can have a cavity drilled without Novocain.
Part of being a great parent is being a great spouse. We want the best for our children; we spend big money for their education and their health care so that they can have the greatest advantages in life. If we want them to have happy marriages, they can only learn it by example. We must strive for happy marriages - if not for our own happiness, then at least for the sake of the children! We don't want them to have to go through divorce and custody battles - either from our failed marriage or from their own failed marriages.
The problem is that many people don't think that bliss is possible in marriage. They have settled for living with the pain. Before Roger Bannister ran the 4 minute mile, everyone told him it was impossible. Within 2 weeks, according to an article I read, 11 others ran faster than 4 minutes. It was never a physical barrier, only a mental barrier. People will only strive for things they think they can achieve!
Children are a gift from the Almighty to teach us that we can have a no-ego relationship. You don't hear a parent say, "I'm not getting anything from this relationship" about his child. With children we know it's hard work and we have little expectation of anything in return. If a child made dinner for you, you'd be thrilled! You would tell everyone you know! One's spouse makes dinner every night, but do we stop to take pleasure in it and to say thank you? We take things for granted. When it comes to parenting, we are into giving. No one is waiting to get anything from their children. We can apply the same outlook to our marriage.
With our children we are into the success mode - if our child has a problem, we will leave no stone unturned to fix that problem. Alan Dershowitz took a year off from work to search and ultimately find a cure after the doctor declared that his child had terminal cancer. We need to have the same commitment to our spouse and to our marriage!
With our children we can forgive and forget. A kid can embarrass us in public, tell us that they don't love us, not pick up their dirty clothing, but we move on and don't dwell on it. People say in marriage be careful of what you say, because you can forgive, but it's never forgotten. (One person told me that when he does something wrong his wife gets all historical. I asked, "You mean hysterical?" He replied, "No, historical - she tells me everything I ever did wrong!). However, we do have the capacity to forgive and forget with our spouse.
Expectations are what destroy a relationship. We are taught in our youth by Hollywood that we will fall in love, our Prince Charming will come (or we will happen across our Sleeping Beauty) and then we will live happily ever after. It ain't so! Just like when you bring a baby home from the hospital, then the work begins; when one graduates from college, he doesn't just get a big pay check - he has to work and to build to reap rewards. And after one gets married, then, too, the work begins!
Once we realize this, we can see that what we get out of the relationship has VERY LITTLE to do with the other person, but everything to do with our expectations! No one is perfect (including you!) Our job is to help our spouse to grow and to accomplish; to encourage and assist. Marriage is about giving, not taking. If we focus on our own obligation to give and not on what we think we should be getting, there will be more marital bliss!
Did your spouse ever do anything that made you think, "Maybe I should get a divorce?" Did your child ever do anything that made you think, "Maybe I should look into adoption?" Just because of difficulties, we don't put our kids up for adoption. The essence of marriage is commitment. Have the same commitment to your spouse as you do to your child!
Is there ever a time for a divorce? Yes. However, if one has gangrene on his hand, he doesn't immediately tell the doctor to cut it off; first, he asks him to cure it. If all else fails, then the doctor amputates. Our spouse is a part of us; we must have the same commitment as to our hand.
Focus on the pleasure you have from your spouse, not the difficulties. Appreciate what your spouse does. Don't have expectations. Stay together not for the children, but for the bliss
See you tomorrow
Love Yehuda Lave
Rabbi Yehuda Lave
2850 Womble Road, Suite 100-619, San Diego United States